For our new people...

The  Culture of Web

Here in Web, we're just a group of girls
There are some guys but really we're the pearls
Or at least the loudest and that's all the matters
In a department so quiet you can hear shoes pitter patter

Around here, you better be quick on your feet
If you don't eat fast, you just don't eat
Because we love our food, especially boba and dim sum
When we're done, there won't be anything left but a crumb

We love dresses and shoes
Lingerie and booze
And there are some who would say
We tend to offend

And if you happen to hear any rumors saying we smell
Or that we're married, pregnant or just not feeling well
Chances are you've been talking to Janet but all the same,
Just stop drinking the water, that's always to blame

We have preggers and cosplay and f-o-m-g
Baby bump, arm swinger and resident pervy
fail shimmy, hiking boots and a giggling Tony
call girl, dino and even hot booty

Scandalosa, rumor mill and that fork loving guy
youngin', froggers and heels oh my
in the corner, there sits our guy, Rasputin,
tall Sam, our paddle machine who gets us quick wins

And of course, we can't forget Juline
Our faraway merchant queen!

I can tell you that we are a welcoming bunch
But don't be sad if you don't get invited to lunch
Invites are sparse between all of us
But jump on anyway, find a seat on our bus

So we welcome you to web
We hope you stay long
Since cross training is hard
Losing you would be wrong